Weirdest conversation ever

Anyone ever watched THE KID with Bruce Willis? Of course not. There's a part in the movie where he is back in time and he is sitting there chillin' with his 9yr-old self. It got me thinking how interesting it would be if the 23yr-old Martin got to hang out and talk to the 9yr-old Martin. Although honestly, I'd rather hang out with the 4yr-old Martin, he was much cuter, much cooler. Anyways, this is seriously what I would make sure I said to the 9yr-old Martin if we were to ever hang out:

1) When you get to high school, try to care more about individuals than about your social status, you'll be glad you did later.
2) Take vitamins so your growth is not stunted
3) Try to be less of a parent, more of a friend to your brothers
4) Make Mom pay for you to get guitar lessons
5) Invest in Google stock
6) I promise, everything is going to be alright

then i'd tickle him (me)